Forward

Hey,

Don't pull yourself down. I know it's hard to bare, difficult as such but somehow it's not the end of the world.
It's a cold, foggy and dark winter day as I am walking down the streets. The world seems even more grey than it did the last couple of weeks. The peoples' faces lack expressions as they walk silently and hasty pass me. I can't smile no more. Not at them.
I am not sad. I am not depressed. I am empty. That's all. Finally the period of living a slob's live comes to an end. It's time to move on. And I am afraid. Though I don't know of what.
The drugs don't work. I can feel that now. Clearly. Yesterday was an other hard night. Plenty of booze running down my throat. We don't need answers when we raise our glases to the illusion of a big night out. More often we even forget to ask the right questions.
I can't tell what or wo I despise more. The world or me? I keep on walking through the streets of this forgein city. My steps are counted by the bumping headache of mine. Why am I so down? I am young. I am having fun.
The world is in racks but this little idiotique life and its shitty little problems are fucking around with us.
It's getting darker. The night lies gently over the town. Without a sound the grey turns into black while I am looking for shelter in a neat coffee bar. I need to rest. I have to think clearly about me and all the things around.
How I wished you were right now! Giving me shelter from my destroying thoughts.
Anyways, it's a starless night as we are heading to the next bar. Have another drink. Just pretend it's lifting you up. It doesn't matter now that you are going to be down in the morning. Just because tomorrow will contain the same grey people and towns. Not just for you. But for everybody.

And please, keep smiling.